Corey Gulkin

Also, apparently some fans have turned this contest into a drinking game. 

I had lady whose name was Kat
kooky little brainiac livin in my flat
we got real close and we got there fast
then she stomped on my heart left me on my ass!

- Z. From Montreal

I met a girl with the codename Macy.
She was into strange conspiracy.
Our first date was quite pedestrian,
so she said I was an evil reptilian.

- I. from Montreal